Like this:

20 Things I’ve Learned About Women

1.  They can smell where other women have been .

“I KNEW something smelled funny !!”

2.  They seem to hit you in the nuts ‘accidentally’ a lot .

Not the best example of an accident .

3.  Against a woman, there is no such thing as ‘losing at wrestling’ .

Unless you’re goin up against this .

4.  It is absolutely required that you first understand how they view themselves .

5.  You must constantly give them attention, surprises, and puppies .

6.  They don’t need to mention everything they appreciate .

7.  At some point, they will cut their bangs and briefly regret it .

Not the best example of ‘cut bangs’ .

8.  Women do not verbally express anything rhetorically .

9.  It’s better to just hand things over versus throwing it to them .

“Okay now I’ll hand it back to you .  See ?  IT’S FUN !”

10.  Being a good example is the most effective form of encouragement for them .

11.  Anything they cook can be forcefully enjoyed .

“Stop whining and deal with it, Howard .”

12.  Women have amazingly impatient bladder systems .

“You don’t understand !  I CAN’T WAIT !!”

13.  They will always keep secrets as long as you make honesty uncomfortable .
14.  Women cheat when you race them up the stairs .

Guys cheat when you race them down .

15.  If something special happened with her, always remember the date .
16.  Make her breakfast, make her presents, but never make her decisions .
17.  A woman doesn’t get ‘attached’ unless she finds a ‘connection’ .
18.  Forget what she says to you, and she’ll forget to tell you things .

“Did I really have to tell you I cheated ?  Look at our kids !”

19.  Acknowledge her presence, respect her privacy, and never test her patience .
20.  They will never .  Ever .  Learn .  Not to pull the hat off a guy’s head .

“NICE TRY, BITCH !”

That’s it !

When D-trix saw the list on my laptop, he decided to add 10 of his own .

D-trix’s 10

21. Giving her more freedom will increase the percentage of her not cheating .
22. If you tell a girl ” we should fight ” and she agrees.. she too wants to have sex .
23. Learn 100% about her in exchange for the least amount of % about you .
24. Tell them how much you love your mom; however, not to much to get them scared .
25. If she farts, get the hell out .

Here’s your head start .

26. Unexpected gifts ( no matter how cheap ) are just as good if not better then what ever you get her on her bday .
27. Random and Spontanious gets them closer .
28. Predictable and usual pushes them away .
29. Always remember the 2 C’s: “Comedy and Confidence” .
30. Shoot them some money and they will stay, shoot them with cum and they might get mad, shoot them and they will die .

“Money ..  gun .. okay, what are we missing ?!”

That last one is probably the most true .  In all respects .

. ryan